The Dynamic Marketing Communiqué

From Choppy to Captivating: Learn the secret to writing that makes clarity feel effortless! [Wednesday: Write with the Pen of the Masters]

Have you ever read a passage that feels disjointed, where ideas appear in fragmented bursts rather than a natural progression? 

If you haven’t yet, just try to imagine reading something like that… 

We bet your facial expression would change upon reading such! 

Now, contrast that with writing that flows so smoothly that each sentence seems to anticipate the next. 

Ah, what a relaxing food for the mind and soul! 

What makes the difference between the two? 

The answer lies in how connections are structured between ideas—a principle expertly explored by Joseph Bizup and Joseph M. Williams in their book, “Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace.”

According to them, many writers assume achieving clarity is as simple as ensuring each sentence is individually clear. 

However, clarity is more than just well-structured sentences; it’s also about how sentences work together to create a seamless reading experience. 

Without cohesion, even the most precise statements can feel disconnected, leaving readers struggling to see the bigger picture.

Understanding Cohesion and Coherence 

In their book, Bizup and Williams introduce two essential concepts for improving writing flow: cohesion and coherence. 

Cohesion refers to how well one sentence connects to the next, while coherence describes the overall logical progression of a passage. 

These elements are crucial because they guide readers effortlessly through a text, reducing cognitive strain and making complex ideas easier to understand.

Consider two versions of the same passage discussing the rising costs of college tuition:

Version 1:

The basis of our American democracy—equal opportunity for all—is being threatened by college costs that have been rising fast for the last several years. Increases in family income have been significantly outpaced by increases in tuition at our colleges and universities during that period. Only the children of the wealthiest families in our society will be able to afford a college education if this trend continues. Knowledge and intellectual skills, in addition to wealth, will divide us as a people when that happens. Equal opportunity and the egalitarian basis of our democratic society could be eroded by such a divide.

Version 2:

In the last several years, college costs have been rising so fast that they are now threatening the basis of our American democracy—equal opportunity for all. During that period, tuition has significantly outpaced increases in family income. If this trend continues, a college education will soon be affordable only by the children of the wealthiest families in our society. When that happens, we will be divided as a people not only by wealth but by knowledge and intellectual skills. Such a divide will erode equal opportunity and the egalitarian basis of our democratic society.

If you’ve observed, both passages contain the same core information, but the second one feels smoother. This is because it follows a fundamental principle of cohesion: Ending sentences with information that naturally leads into the next. 

By contrast, the first version jumps between ideas without clear transitions, making it feel choppy and disorganized.

So, how can you improve your sentences’ cohesion? 

According to Bizup and Williams, one of the most effective ways to create cohesion in writing is by following the “old before new” principle. 

After all, readers prefer encountering familiar information at the start of a sentence before being introduced to new concepts. Hence, this technique builds a natural bridge from one idea to the next, guiding readers through a logical progression.

For example:

Some astonishing questions about the nature of the universe have been raised by scientists studying black holes in space. The collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble creates a black hole.

While grammatically correct, the transition between sentences feels abrupt. By applying the “old before new” principle, we can restructure the sentence as:

Some astonishing questions about the nature of the universe have been raised by scientists studying black holes in space. A black hole is created by the collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble.

This minor adjustment improves readability by maintaining the focus on “black holes”—the key concept introduced in the first sentence—before presenting new information about their formation.

What’s more? 

Bizup and Williams also highlighted three key principles for improving clarity and flow: 

  • Make main characters the subjects of sentences. Readers process information more easily when key subjects appear at the start of a sentence.

  • Make important actions verbs. Strong verbs help clarify meaning and drive the narrative forward.

  • Put old information before new information. Sentences should begin with familiar concepts before introducing new details.

When these principles work together, writing becomes not only clearer but also more engaging. 

Remember: Readers experience writing as a continuous stream of thought, and if each sentence builds logically on the previous one, comprehension improves dramatically.

— 

You see, the difference between good writing and great writing often comes down to cohesion. 

By applying the principles outlined by Bizup and Williams in “Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace,” you can transform your work from disjointed and choppy to fluid and engaging. 

Prioritizing logical connections between sentences ensures readers stay engaged, grasp complex ideas more easily, and ultimately enjoy the reading experience. 

After all, writing isn’t just about being clear; it’s also about making clarity feel effortless.


About The Dynamic Marketing Communiqué’s
“Wednesdays: Write with the Pen of the Masters”

Who doesn’t find content writing to be a skill that requires a lot of practice and effort?

In fact, many people may even find copywriting very intimidating.

However, you can be a good writer as long as you have the right tools. You won’t always get things right the first time, but with enough time and practice, you’ll get the hang of it!

When you write copy for any brand or for your company, your aim is to make an impact and…

… to get people to remember.

Getting people to remember means getting consumers to buy your product or avail of your service.

… and when you get your content to deliver the results you want, THAT is great copy!

Every Wednesday, we publish content based on tips and insights from the masters of content writing, copywriting, and storytelling.

Become more familiar with ways to write great copy that helps you gain ROI from your efforts, drive profitability, and achieve your business goals.

Learn time-tested tactics that better capture the attention of your target audience, and maximize the benefits of great copywriting.

Hope you find this week’s insights interesting and helpful.

Stay tuned for next Wednesday’s “Write with the Pen of the Masters!”


Cheers,

Dyane Diasanta
Senior Content Writer
Valens Dynamic Marketing Capabilities
Powered by VX Dynamic
www.vxdynamic.com

Get the Latest Tips to Your Inbox

Subscribe to our newsletter to receive the best guidelines and tips to help you achieve your business goals.