One of the oldest principles in communication is surprisingly simple:
People are more likely to follow someone who first makes them feel understood.
This doesn’t mean copying people’s personalities or pretending to feel emotions you don’t genuinely have. It simply means acknowledging where they already are.
Think about a good friend comforting someone who’s upset. They don’t walk into the conversation saying, “Cheer up! Everything’s amazing!” nor do they become equally overwhelmed.
Instead, they meet the other person emotionally. They listen, validate, then, little by little, they help lift the conversation towards hope.
Public speaking works the same way.
Before audiences can climb with you, they need to believe you’ve arrived where they are.
Some people misunderstand this idea: Mirroring isn’t imitation but calibration.
Imagine speaking to energetic, curious, and optimistic college students during orientation. In such a scenario, your presentation should feel conversational, dynamic, and playful.
Now, imagine addressing senior executives discussing declining quarterly revenue. Using that same playful style would feel out of place.
To establish a connection with such an audience, your delivery, pace, tone, examples, and emotional intensity should match theirs.
Here’s where many speakers stop, though: They successfully match the audience but never move beyond it.
If everyone is low-energy, they stay low-energy.
If everyone is nervous, they remain nervous.
If everyone is skeptical, they sound equally doubtful.
That’s not leadership; that’s just emotional imitation.
The goal isn’t simply to reflect the audience; it’s to become the bridge between where they are and where they need to be.
Think of yourself as an elevator: People step in on one floor and they expect to arrive somewhere higher, not remain exactly where they started.
… or think of yourself like a great DJ: They don’t begin every event by playing the loudest, fastest song imaginable. They first read the room.
If people are still arriving, they ease everyone in. Then, as the energy grows, the music gradually changes.
Soon, the dance floor fills naturally. No one notices the transition because it feels effortless.
Public speakers should do the same!
You don’t start at maximum intensity; you build towards it.
So, what are some practical ways to mirror and up-level your audience?
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Observe Before You Speak
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Match Their Opening Pace
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Validate Their Current Reality
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Increase Energy Gradually
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End Higher Than You Began
Spend a few minutes watching the audience.
Are they talking?
Are they laughing?
Are they quiet?
Are they checking emails?
Are they tense?
These observations tell you more than any event agenda ever could.
If the room feels calm, don’t rush in at full speed. If the room is already energized, don’t slow everything down.
Meet the audience where they naturally are.
Your first minute should feel familiar, then your next 10 minutes should feel transformational.
People appreciate speakers who recognize what’s happening, as simple acknowledgments can immediately create rapport.
Examples include:
“It’s been a long conference day.”
“I know everyone’s juggling a lot right now.”
“There’s a lot of uncertainty in our industry.”
These statements communicate to your audience that you “see” and understand them, and that’s powerful!
Your voice doesn’t need to leap from level two to level 10 in an instant.
Instead, let your enthusiasm grow alongside your ideas. Don’t worry, the audience won’t feel manipulated; they’ll simply feel carried forward.
Regardless of where people started emotionally, they should leave feeling more hopeful, motivated, curious, confident, or inspired.
If your audience finishes exactly as they arrived, you’ve simply informed them. If they leave emotionally elevated, you’ve moved them.
Your Energy Sets the Destination
You see, every speech creates an emotional journey.
Some presentations leave audiences feeling overwhelmed… others leave them feeling hopeful… some drain the room… others recharge it.
The difference often has very little to do with the slides or the statistics. It often comes down to emotional leadership.
Mirror your audience enough that they feel understood, then become the person who gently raises the standard.
Raise curiosity.
Raise the confidence.
Raise the optimism.
Raise the possibility.
Besides, audiences don’t remember every sentence you say; they always remember how they felt when they walked out of the room.
If they leave carrying more energy than they brought in, you’ve done more than deliver a speech—you’ve sparked momentum.
… and sometimes, that’s the difference between applause that lasts a few seconds and influence that lasts for years.
We hope you’ll apply these tips to your next public speaking engagements!
About The Dynamic Marketing Communiqué’s
“Thursdays: Speak on the Shoulders of Giants”
In a meeting with one person…
… a boardroom with five people…
… or a huge venue with hundreds of people…
—whatever the situation or setting, it’s very important to learn and eventually master the art of public speaking.
No matter what, you always need to effectively get your message across.
What good is a presentation with awesome content if you don’t deliver it properly?
Every Thursday, we publish different tips, insights, and secrets on how you can improve your presentation skills to captivate your audience and lead interesting discussions.
The need for great presentation skills applies EVERYWHERE.
(Small meetings with your team, big meetings with your boss, an important marketing pitch, speaking engagements for events with a big audience, etc.)
Learning these skills is not just for the corporate world. Being in other industries such as the Arts, Information Technology, Medicine, and Education while knowing how to communicate and present well will definitely give you an edge.
Have that advantage.
Hope you find this week’s public speaking tip interesting and helpful.
Stay tuned for next Thursday’s “Speak on the Shoulders of Giants!”
Cheers,
Henry Desai
Managing Director
Valens Dynamic Marketing Capabilities
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